February 4th, 2010 by jeffbahr

 The chile-lime Ranch sauce is the reason that Arby’s Southwest mini-egg rolls are great.

 The egg rolls, which are good, taste like something you’d get from Taco John’s. But the sauce is what makes them subLime.

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 Many Aberdonians have pork loin in their freezers. They wait for it to go on sale and then stock up on it.

 My father is the same way with Clementines.

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 A prominent local sportswriter criticizes the pizza at Chuck E. Cheese, calling it “tomato sauce on cardboard.”

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 The opinionated sportswriter prefers Space Aliens to Chuck E. Cheese, saying you get the same games and better food.

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 Heather Price informs us that there’s a difference between a “fashionable pump” and a stiletto. I had no idea.

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  South Dakota Highway Patrolmen drive Ford Crown Victorias.

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  Dan Richardt says Sunday’s game is Super Bowl Extra Large IV.

  Where else can you get quality Roman numeral humor?

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 The annual Ice Bowl disc golf tournament is this weekend. Organizers say the event will not be postponed, no matter the weather. No whiners are allowed.

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 I’m jealous of Shawn. Because he lives downtown, he has easy access to a lot of good eating places. And because he doesn’t drive, he’s in much better shape than I am. 

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 If Michael Vick were to join the Vikings, Bryan Bahr says, “he’d fit right in with that lawless gang of hoodlums.” 

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 I understand that an aberdeennews.com reader, identifying herself as a volleyball fan, calls hockey a boring game.

 How could a volleyball fan call any other sport boring?

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 Why does Jake McCloskey never go to movies? Because of his 52-inch high-definition TV with surround sound.

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 With all the swearing they’re allowing on Spike, TNT, TBS and Comedy Central, who needs HBO?

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 Now we find out that Men at Work ripped off “Kookaburra Sits in the Old Gum Tree.”

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 Why is the Sioux City hockey team called the Musketeers?

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  I can’t decide if I want to open a saloon or a salon.

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  Do I understand it correctly that Temple’s basketball team plays some role in the plot of “Lost”?

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  I understand that Bristol is home to a historic theater called the Old Vic.

  I don’t remember seeing it while driving through town. I didn’t even know Bristol had a Shakespearean repertory company. 

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 I couldn’t help but notice that Al Novstrop voted against embryonic stem cell research and Jim Hundstad voted in favor of it.

 Jim Hundstad also probably prefers volleyball to hockey.